- Yes (with Full Liturgy)
- Yes (without Mass)
- No (Not Catholic at the Time)
- No (with Dispensation)
- No (without Dispensatoin)
- No (I accepted Christ’s Call to Religious Life)
- Nope (Still living that Single Life)
My Wife was newly Catholic and we chose to have the Full Liturgy (we wanted all the grace we could get).
I sent our Choir director an e-mail and asked if he or any of the Choir members would be willing to sing at our Wedding and offered him a list of my favorite hymns, with the knowledge that many in attendance would not be Catholic and some not Christians at all. He accepted. In hindsight we should have gifted them something for making our Wedding day all the more special.
We still have family and friends who tell us that our Wedding was so beautiful.
My advice to any young couple is to make it all about God. Choose verses that are not most commonly used at Weddings. Fr. Raymond gave us a book with verses to choose from and we purposely chose ones that we liked, but were heard less. There are some people who, when they hear something they have heard a million times, they tune out, but when something sounds fresh and new, it speaks to them.
Pray for every person who will be in attendance at your Wedding either in general or by name, that they encounter Christ on your special day.
My last piece of advice to young couples is to take advantage of Marriage-prep (ours was called Pre-Cana). The Wedding Day is great, but a lifetime together can be truly blessed by knowing you are with the right person. If your fiancé is not taking Marriage-prep seriously (sits there with his arms crossed or she rolls her eyes), then maybe he/she is not ready to be Married. We had about 15 couples go through Pre-Cana with us and by the last day, I could tell which couples were actually ready for Marriage and which ones probably not going to have a successful Marriage. I wonder how many of these couples are still Married today. There was one couple at our table that are totally Married and we see them often at Mass with their daughter. There was another couple at our table that I did not think should be getting Married.
Marriage is a covenant, not a contract. A covenant is a relationship built upon unconditional love, sacrifice, and self-giving. If you want to know what covenant means, look to Christ’s life, death, and resurrection for the perfect example. Our Baptism is the start of our covenantal relationship with God, the Eucharist is intimacy with God, Prayer is communicating with God, and Reconciliation is admitting our shortcomings and asking God for help to improve on my end of this relationship. Our Marriage should reflect these gifts. And when it does, you will have a fruitful and Blessed Marriage. This does not mean that you will have a perfect Marriage. This does not mean that everyday will be easy, but it does mean that together you can choose to love, forgive, and be self-giving to one another.
Married people, feel free to share any advice you have for soon-to-be Married couples. Maybe you did it all wrong and do not want someone else to make the same mistakes or maybe you have done it right (with mistakes along the way) and want to share what you find helpful in your own Catholic Marriage.
God Bless all Catholic Married People, loving, forgiving, and self-sacrificing, Amen ♱