Our daughter is gay. She just announced she is engaged. I was with the understanding that we can attend, acknowledge her choice. Does this mean forever. As long as they are a union we can never celebrate or wish them well. Being a daughter that God has made , I don’t always understand. She is still a child of God!
Very very sad Mom
Remember you can and indeed should always still love her (her soul). It’s only her behavior that you can’t support.
I try to discern between the two in my own life, in regards to people who do things that I believe are wrong.
I hope this helps you a bit. 
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This is tough. I do not know your daughter personally nor her maturity level. What I mean by this is, can she understand that you still love her, even though you acknowledge that there is no such thing as same-sęx Marriage? Or would she take it as you not loving her?
I would not attend a ceremony of a same-sęx couple. And I would let my daughter know that I care about her dearly, but I cannot support a counterfeit version of Marriage. For the same reasons I would not receive Communion in a Protestant Church. It is not out of disrespect, but that I believe and value the real thing and to partake in the celebration of a counterfeit, would be a deception on my part.
I understand that some will misconstrue this as hateful, but I do not hate those who celebrate an imitation. I feel sorry for such and I Pray they could find joy in the real thing.
I can be friends with individuals who disagree with me. We can have differing views on our perceptions of the world in which we live. Others are incapable of being friends or family with those who disagree with them on many things. This is what I mean by maturity level.
I have a brother and sister-in-law whom I have not seen in years, because they have two trąns children (one is four years old) and I refuse to play make-believe. My Momz on the other hand is trying so hard to play the game and has slipped a couple times, and for her trąnsgression (mistake), they are no longer speaking to her.
Do you fear that your daughter will not speak to you if you do not attend her ceremony?
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We have a daughter who married another woman. I love her, accept this, but told her this was not my generation. My values and Catholic beliefs oppose this but what else can I do but be there. Her wife is a wonderful person by the way.
I don’t know what her reaction will be. She was raised Catholic until 16 years old when she left. We had a rough start when she came out. I closed off life for a whole year it was horrible. We have mended the relationship and I would do anything for her except!!! We are going to talk with our priest to get a better understanding for the future. Can we never be happy for her???
Than you for your response
Thanks, Angela
Nothing good ever comes out of denial. Things are what realtors is. Our daughter has mature since she has live with Jenna her partner, and she is a great person. Jenna has a 16 year old autistic son that loves our daughter and welcomed the engagement with open arms. I feel I lost these relationships. I will always love Amanda
No matter what.
Thanks, Angela
I would not go because it would look like accepting it as a valid marriage. In the past, I told a good friend and a family member that I would not go to their weddings because they were planning to marry or considering marrying divorced men—in one case, the man had been divorced twice. Both the friend and the relative were Catholic women.
A friend of mine told me he went to a homosexual wedding of a family member to show support, even though it bothered his conscience. He was not welcomed by the other guests and was sorry he went.
In Encourage meetings I’ve attended (for family and friends of people who have same-sex attractions) I’ve heard of homosexual so-called marriages that didn’t last, though that’s not unusual with heterosexual marriages either. I think that the people choosing homosexual marriage may not truly love the other person (that is, be willing to do what is best for the other person). If they did, would they choose this relationship at all? Or are they choosing it for gratification, thinking it will make them happy?
I would go! Our God is everlasting love and has put your daughter in your life to love.
Santa, Our God is also a just God.
It’s so heart wrenching reading your story! It remind me during the lockdown, family could not go visit their relatives on nursing homes, hospitals, and many cases even go to mass! Well, in you case if you decide to ignore God’s Law, you can go and visit them, you will not be arrested, God is so lovely that he gave us freedom, man’s law ate not the same, they take our freedom in name of " protection". Pray for both of them, it’s all and the best you can do. Stay firm, with God’s intervention, she will figure that she’s 100 wrong. What angry me is that our government with the " Science" are pushing this yrocity on kids that has no wisdom, formed in their brain. Well, they removed the teaching of comunsense from the public schrewools while back, and Catholic schools ate also falling in line. Money, money. God? Asked the Bishops!
Thank you for your response. Praying for them and us is all we can ever do.
Thanks, Angela
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Matthew 10:34-36 is a difficult pill to swallow in such a trying time that you’re experiencing. I hope that things work out to where you can continue to have (or develop) an authentic and meaningful relationship with your daughter.
Thank you I appreciate your thoughts
Thanks, Angela
I would attend, absolutely.
Your daughter is more important than your religion. Go to the wedding.
I have a question for you David. I presume (and maybe I’m wrong) that you are not a fan of President Trump (neither am I, but I do not suffer from TDS). Let’s say that your daughter was going to Marry a Trump and you are invited. Would you go? Or would that go against your religion? I know many Democrats who have made their politics their religion. And they would #resist. Would you?
I would support my daughter if she were Marrying a Trump (as long as the man she is Marrying has not been validly Married previously, civically divorced, and not granted an annulment, because then he would be still Married to his first Wife in the eyes of God and the Church. Her fiancé therefore would be committing adultery and the Marriage would be invalid).
I guess what I am getting at is that I would not support an invalid Marriage. I would explain to my doughter that I love her very much, and this is why I cannot attend. If she, like David, interprets my decision as loving her less (or “choosing my religion over her”) then that is on her, though it is not the truth.
Here is an analogy to illustrate my point. I did not vote for President Trump, and many Republicans interpret my not going to the polls and voting for President Trump as a vote for Kamala (or that I am choosing Kamala over President Trump), but this is not true. I did not vote for Vice-President Kamala, and many Democrats interpret my not going to the polls and voting for Kamala as a vote for Trump (or choosing Trump over Vice-President Kamala, but this is not true. I do not vote for evil. I define “evil” as not of God. I know many who believe that President Trump was chosen by God. I know many who believe God is fine with sąme-sęx so-called “marriage.” I believe God willed neither. And truth is truth. Either I am wrong and you are right or you are wrong and I am right. Or neither of us are right. What is, is not subjective. I believe in objective truth, in spite of what one might believe about what is true.
We can throw another hypothetical in here if you would like. What if your fifteen year old wanted to Marry here High School Science Teacher (and he is in his 40’s). Would you attend the Wedding? Or would you “support your doughter”? Or might you explain to her why you cannot attend the Wedding?