Prayer Intentions for Me

Catholic Living Prayer Intentions
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So, I’m not Catholic/Christian, but I really would like some prayers. I struggle with homosexuality, and it’s something I want to stop. It’s hard because I’ve been so brainwashed into thinking it’s a normal thing, and I’ll sometimes catch myself saying things like “babe” or “sweetie” to another man.

I’m trying to heal, because, it’s weird but I’m so used to making bad decisions, and I don’t want to make bad decisions anymore. I want to be with God and be on his side, but at the same time I don’t want to join a Church. So I ask that you all pray for me, cause we are near the end times and I feel like I’ve wasted my life on this. I’m so glad I don’t have a wife or even children, God has blessed me in that respect, because I don’t want a child to have to go through this torture. I can’t even adopt, I can barely take care of myself. Just please pray for me.

For now I have thrown in the towel. I basically said “It doesn’t matter what it is I do, I always end up hurting people who love me. Jesus and God, take the wheel cause I can’t seem to figure out how to end this.” I don’t want to go to Hell, I never wanted to go to Hell. It’s hard to talk about this because at one point, I thought that it didn’t matter what I did, whether it be good or bad, I was just going to end up in Hell anyways. So, I dunno. I’m just surrendering to God and I just want him to do something for me, cause I’m not strong enough to resist this. I’ve tried multiple things and it’s like I can’t commit and it bothers me that I can’t commit, and really lately it’s like I can’t commit to anything.

Anyway…..thank you for reading this, God bless your soul! To have to listen to someone like me I’m sure can be exhausting and sad. I just need an outlet, cause right now I dunno what to do….

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I will pray for you. Surrendering to God is the best thing you can do. I mentioned in another thread that one pastor in Virginia, during a sermon, said that some of us in the congregation were teetering on the edge of despair, and I was. He said that God was working on our problems and would resolve them in a way we could not imagine. And it happened to me. I’m not promising anything. Your desires may not go away. But God will be with you, and not just watching you suffer but helping somehow.

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I’m very sorry that you are suffering. It must be very hard to live with desires you do not want and to struggle against habits that you have formed.

But in Christ, it is possible to change. We are all weak, but Christ offers us new a new life. One saint who showed it is possible to change is St. Augustine (you may wish to read about him if you are looking for some inspiration).

Please know of my prayers for you.

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Thank you so much! It is hard (especially me being a 36 year old man) to not go out and seek a relationship with another man. And it’s hard cause I’ll be looking at these straight couples and I just get sad, cause I desire a relationship just like anyone else. But I know too, that any decision I make just creates more chaos. This is going to sound counter-intuitive, and when I say this I don’t have a death sentence, but I’ve basically given up. I’m putting up the white flag and surrendering to God. I said basically “Since I can’t seem to do anything right, I give up. I want God to guide my decisions.” Yes, I’m basically giving my life to God and let him make the decisions, cause any decision I make isn’t good.

Although I will say this, giving up on the decision making makes me feel so free. I know that what I say sounds odd, but It’s a great feeling. It’s a great feeling to feel powerless, and to not make any decision without consulting with the man upstairs. I just hope I’m good enough to live eternally happy.

@Literalman Thank you for this. I know I struggle badly with sexual immorality, but I’m trying my best. Thank you.

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@EarthsStudent, Thank you for your candidness. I don’t think you are alone in this. And I hope that brings you comfort.

The fact that you are being honest and real, I respect a lot.

We should not be good, simply because we fear Hell. We should want to be good, because God, our loving Father, is good.

I invite you to read Jesus’ parable of the lost son. It is found in chapter 15 of Luke, verses 11–32. Really all of chapter 15 is good. Next, I would recommend you read the entire Gospel of John. It speaks too of the Father’s love.

I have a third-cousin who had been addicted to alcohol since the age of 13. One day his Wife said she could not do it anymore. She was not going to leave him, but she saw that it had taken control of him. She was not saying anything that he didn’t already know. He had tried to stop many times (on his own). That night he Prayed and gave it all over to Jesus. The next day the urge to drink was gone. This went on for a few days and he realized that it was not he who was doing this, but an answer to a Prayer. If you are open, I invite you to read Matthew 7:7-11.

Ephesians 4:22-23 says, “Put away the old self of your former way of life, corrupted through deceitful desires and be renewed in the Spirit.” Verse 24 says, “and put on the new self, created in God’s way…”

St. Paul shares the following in his letter to the Christians in Philippi, “I continue my pursuit toward the goal, the prize of God’s upward calling, in Christ Jesus, forgetting my past and straining forward to what lies ahead” (Philippians 3:13-14). He goes on to talk about how some have made their appetites their god, glory in shameful things, and think only about earthly things; and how ultimately this will destroy them (v. 19).

Even though we Pray, habits usually do not go away easily, if we do not change our minds towards the Heavenly. “Our citizenship is in Heaven, and from it we also await a savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. He will change our lowly body to conform with his…” (v. 20-21).

I knot that you said that you are not a Catholic Christian. I would love to hear your faith journey, if you are willing to share it. Were you raised in a Christian home? Are you Baptized? You can private message me if you would prefer. I enjoy learning about the lives of others. We can learn a lot from learning about the lives of others. This is why we venerate the lives of saints, none of whom were perfect, but it is about what God did in their lives that matters. It starts with turning over our wills to God’s will in our lives (easier said than done).

Thank you again for your witness. This is just the start of something good, true, and beautiful. Don’t beat yourself up. Look forward and not backward. Do you mind if I keep you in my Prayers? When we Pray for others, it changes something in our own hearts as well.

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Peace to all,

Peace always,

Stephen

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Dear friend, Your “habit” is in a sense an addiction. An effective way to overcome this IS, as you ARE, seek help. The Best, Most effective help “you” can find, is the Blessed Mother…. [1] get and keep a blessed rosary on your person 24/7. … You’ll often find in the entrance way of your Catholic Church. [2] God to Catholic Sacramental Confession/the priest WILL guide you if necessary [3] Pray the rosary daily asking Mary to help you overcome this issue. …. Get to Catholic Mass at least on the weekend. …. YOU do these actions, and with sincere perseverance, GOD will come you your aid….. Discipline and perseverance ARE critical keys. May Mary and Jesus soon, and very soon, come to your aid. Patrick Miron

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Let’s talk common sense. You have a head-start in the sense that you believe in the power of God to create change in us.
There are two currents of energy at work. Two powers. One is material. The other is spiritual . Jesus made a distinction. He said in his “sermon on the mount”, that we have to serve one or the other. “A man cannot serve two masters.” We are in service to one or we are in service to the other. We are desiring to serve our senses…… or we are desiring to give pleasure to God.

In this sense, having homosexual propensities is not worse than having heterosexual propensities. There is history of one Catholic Bishop in France who died in a brothel of a heart attack. Most Catholics/protestants want to have their cake and eat it. They want to come closer to God, but at the same time they want to enjoy their material senses. These two propensities are mutually exclusive. All of the saints, in all religious traditions, were very indifferent to the demands of the senses. Saint Francis was one of them. People consider them to be very austere. But no one can do this aritificially. We have to get our pleasure, our satisfaction, one way or another. A saint is one who is enjoying spiritual pleasure. Spiritual pleasure makes one indifferent to the demands off the senses. This is the symptom of one who is coming closer to God. Most people are simply members of one church or another. They think this is good enough. But even if they do pious activities, Jesus said this does not make closer to God. “Good works alone”, he said doesn’t cut it. One has to come closer to God. How”? Jesus says that the highest mode of approach is to cultivate love for God with all of our heart. Hindu, Christian, Muslim, Jew. The same rule applies.
However, no one can come closer to God, no one can cultivate feelings of love for God while at the same time, indulging in the demands of the senses.
What applies to you applies to all heterosexual people as well. The struggle is not about changing from homosexual to heterosexual. The struggle is about changing from being a slave to our senses to becoming a loving servant of God. In this context, “servant” means love. Where do we repose our loving propensity. A Catholic man who engages in sex with his wife for entertainment is not better positioned than you. They will not like to hear this. But this is the message of Jesus. “A man cannot have two masters.” Therefore it is not that you have to change from being attracted to men to being attracted to women. It is that you have to change from being a material sensualist to one who derives pleasure in giving pleasure to God. Both the heterosexual and the homosexual have this same challenge. In the spiritual path that I practice, we take vows not to eat animals, birds, fish, eggs, not to take any form of intoxication, not to have sex outside of a desire for procreation, and not to engage in gambling. Anyone who observes these prohibitions automatically lowers the fever of material lust so that he can begin to open his heart to God. In this way, beginning to enjoy a sense of loving reciprocation with God, one becomes free of the sensual desires within his heart. Otherwise he is Hindu, a Christian, a Muslim or Jew in name only. He is a church member. He thinks he is saved, whereas he has really not begun the real journey of the soul. You were born that way. Spiritual life is not about changing your material desires. It is about changing your material desires into spiritual desires. This called “Sublimation”. Desire cannot be killed. But we can begin to desire what is in our eternal self-interest. Enlightened self-interest. Love of God is our enlightened self-interest. All religions are teaching love of God. God is not our order-supplier, like Amazon.com, wherein we ask Him for what we want to enjoy in this material world. Jesus teaches by example when he says, “Not what I want from You my Lord, but what do You want from me?” “Not my will, but Thy will.” This is real religion. Therefore if you want to free of these material desires, for men, for women, for fame for fortune, for name and fame, for real property, for fine clothing, for satisfaction of the tongue, belly and genital…….you have to become closer to God by opening your heart to God. Not by having a bath and saying, “Now I am saved.”, and continuing to live like a gross materialist. You can ask people to pray for you. But ask them to pray for you that you can begin to “love the Lord Thy God with all of your heart.” Then all your problems will be solved.

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Thank you!

@catholic-catechist41 Thank you for your input.

@Peter1 Thank you!

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Greetings Cade One! I like your answer. Peter

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Morality is not the goal. Morality is a tool. In this world, everyone is driven by material desires. The Bhagavad-gita (spoken by Krishna) states that sensual desire burns like a fire. This means that the more we feed a fire, it is never satisfied. Rather, the flames grow stronger. Material pursuit is compared to a feverish condition. Morality is for bringing the feverish way of life down to 98.6 degrees. In a feverish condition, one cannot hear about what is good for him. As the temperature comes down to normal, one’s mind becomes clear. Therefore morality is the first step, a prerequisite to spiritual life, in all traditions. But not the goal. Therefore Jesus says that it is not by being a “good” person that one is “saved”: “Not by good works alone…..”. But one has to fall in love ………with God…..and delight in that way, feeling God’s loving reciprocation. In this sense, real religion is not an austerity, but a pleasure. Once we get a taste……we want more. And morality is the prerequisite……not the goal. Because over time, one’s determination will fail. The trend is cyclic, self-indulgence followed by renunciation, followed by indulgence. We have to have pleasure. We’re not made of stone. But the real way to avoid so-called immorality is to come to the platform of spiritual pleasure. Then resisting the demands of the flesh is effortless. One experiences himself as a child of God, and enjoys it. “My cup runneth over.” And morality, austerity is the first step. Do you imagine that a personality like Jesus had immoral tendencies? But he went to the desert and fasted for 40 days before he began to preach. Why? Only to show us that the first thing we have to do is bring down the fever to 98.6 degrees. Jesus is perfect. But he teaches by example. He even accepted baptism. Does Jesus need baptism? John recognized Jesus, and said, “I’m not even fit to tie your shoe-laces.” But Jesus said, “You give me this ceremony so that we can set a good example.” So that’s what morality is all about. It’s an austerity. And as an austerity, it’s a tool, a first step on the spiritual path. So, if you stop eating animal flesh, stop any and all intoxication, including caffeine, stop sexual activity completely, and avoid gambling……you’ll become sober. Your mind and body will work differently From that point, spiritual life can begin. You don’t have to fast for 40 days. Just keep those principles, and you’ll become a different person. It’s all about working with nature’s laws, and benefitting from them, instead of being defeated by them. Then you can begin to approach God with an open heart. But the two have to work as parallel tracks. Little austerity and spiritual intention. One without the other won’t cut it. We can’t have our proverbial cake and eat it. We can’t work against the laws of nature and hope to come closer to God. So it takes a little intelligence to come up with a game plan. If you look at the saints …….in any tradition……they practiced austerity……not as a form of self-affliction…….but to acquire sobriety, strength of determination, clarity of purpose, and a sense of honesty. Honesty……because we can’t ask for help in overcoming the flesh while serving the demands of the flesh. Two masters. This is not for everyone. Those who are so-called well-adjusted in society, they become complacent. They feel superior, self-righteous. They won’t grow. But a person like you becomes pushed, begins search for real answers. Just like when Jesus was crucified. There was a man beside him on another cross. He was the worst of sinful men. But in that condition of inconceivable discomfort, he really wanted help. And he turned to Jesus for help, with real sincerity. And Jesus said, “You got it!” In other words, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for they will know God.” In other words, “The first can be last, and the last can be first.” The so-called well-adjusted “good” person may not make it. But a person like you can. I am speaking from experience. Because I was a pretty bad fellow. But my misery forced me to find answers. I’m a long way from perfection. But beginning to have a taste of God’s love……now I’m caught. I know what I want. You can do it too. Anyone can……..when they’ve suffered enough. That suffering……that’s one of the ways that God pushes us forward. It’s another way in which He loves us.

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Well I’m not going to lie, giving up is so freeing. It’s so freeing to admit that I’ve been defeated, cause in all seriousness I am. I refuse to make choices right now, in fact right now I’m going to sit with myself and work on becoming a better person. Many of the things I want to do, I can’t, so I decided to throw in the towel. Cause all I do is hurt other people. So, I’m going to keep to myself and let God take control. Cause, I have no idea what to do or where to go. All I know to do is to work on myself and keep God close. I mean, I’ve pretty much lost everything, there’s not much more I can lose. So, since I have nothing to lose, I can only gain from here on out,

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HeavensChild is what I would like o rename you. I was so grieved by your sense of self deprecation and sense of helplessness–if not hopelessness. Foremost, refuse to allow the devil to deceive you. He is the Discourager. Though you are not Catholic, I entreat you to contact CourageRC (couragerc.org) that will bring you that peace of heard, mind, and soul. There you will find kindred souls but in the confidence that they are trying to live in truth and love. By the way, regardless of sexual attraction, each of us can “feel” as you do. Each of us stumbles. Each of us sins. Each of us must frequently rise, brush ourselves off and go forward (upward.) Take courage, and recall the words of St. Padre Pio, “Pray, hope, and do not worry,” and trust he and millions of others are interceding for you. I will be praying for you, too.