Funny Bible verses

What’s your favorite funny or weird Bible verses/stories? Even if taken out of context.

I’ll start

Mark 14:51-52
Now a young man followed him wearing nothing but a linen cloth about his body. They seized him, but he left the cloth behind and ran off naked.

Why did Mark think this was an important thing to note? This is during the arrest of Jesus and I guess the fact one guy got away but was naked had importance haha. Side note: there are scholars who think the man who ran off was John the apostle.

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Most Bible scholars, of whom I am one, feel that this IS Mark, who later write the Gospel and was an interpreter of Peter. He did not want to be humiliated but wanted to show that he was an early follower.

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@ShotClocker, I too was going to bring up Mark 14, about the naked running-man : )

2 kings 2:23-24

From there Elisha went up to Bethel. While he was on the way, some little boys came out of the city and jeered at him: “Go away, baldy; go away, baldy!”

The prophet turned and saw them, and he cursed them in the name of the LORD. Then two she-bears came out of the woods and tore forty-two of the children to pieces.

My co-worker (a Pastor’s Wife) is doing a verse-a-day through the entire Protestant Bible and this was the verse one day. I looked it up in the translation that I often use and it tamed it down quite a bit. She uses the New Living Translation (see below ; )

Ezekiel 23:20

She lusted after lovers with genitals as large as a donkey’s and emissions like those of a horse.

One time, my cousin was asked to read the Sunday Reading in CCD and he accidentally mispronounced the word “Gentiles” as “genitals.” Ha-ha! : )

HAH! That is funny. I remember once a man who’s a lawyer and was a reader and came upon the word “brazier”, but he pronounced it as “brassiere”.


John 9:27, the reply to the Pharisees: Do you want to become his disciples too?


Acts 19: 13-16 and 20: 7-12.

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